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I’m carpet bombing them with the same boilerplate message, suggesting, with unsurpassed creativity and seductiveness, that we get together for a drink.

I’m on Ashley Madison.com, the behemoth of extramarital-dating sites, whose controversial slogan is "Life is short. But you probably don’t know anyone on it—or at least anyone who admits to being on it.

Soon after, she removes my glasses without asking permission. "They need to smell good to me: healthy, alive, confident.

"Your glasses are so clouded, I need to clean them," she explains, wiping them on her shirt. I can smell fear; I want them to smell like they deserve me.

Megan prefers younger men whom she can think of as her "boy toys—my playthings." She asks how old I am.

I tell her 33, and she points at me and says, "That’s my perfect age." Later she clasps her hand over mine for a few seconds when I make a joke.

What, exactly, is compelling these married women to set up "sexy dates" in droves, aside from easy Internet access?

For years, our collective narrative of the errant housewife has run thusly: Neglected by her aloof or abusive husband and dying a slow death from her suburban prison, she falls into the arms of a dashing, romantic gentleman.

BIG THICK [rhyming masculine body part] NEED APPLY!!! My first e-mail blitz, which doesn’t specify that I’m a journalist hoping to interview subjects, nets me a grand total of zero replies. I change tack and name-drop Yet a few replies roll in. (Identifying details have been obscured or altered slightly to ensure anonymity, and all names are fictitious.) She lists her weight at well over 200 pounds, her limits are "Anything Goes," and her tagline is "I’m too much for you." And what is she looking for? I’m not here at AM to meet someone for the opera, I assure you."What the hell is going on here?

op-ed this year, some studies have shown that women report more sexual partners than men, are less selective in certain contexts, and are nearly as likely to accept casual sex from a celebrity or from a close friend they’ve been told is good in the sack.

There’s also a keeping-up-with-the-Mrs.-Robinsons pressure, especially among wives who have at least as much power as their spouses, says Kate Bolick, author of _The Atlantic’_s much discussed "All the Single Ladies" cover article.

Her friends (granted, a self-selecting cohort) are just as randy as she is, though not all seek out external solutions—to their detriment, she believes.

"They’re all unhappy with the amount of sex they’re getting—the ones who are still married," she says. The ones who’ve started playing around are much happier."But what about the guilt? My marriage would be in shambles if I wasn’t playing outside the marriage." Such playing is not without its risks; she’s fallen for men before, she admits, and says heartbreak is part of the game.

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